Tuesday, May 17, 2005

Key Indicators* That You May Not Be Cut Out to Be a Gangster
  1. You enjoy playing with Yu-gi-oh cards, yet find their many rules confusing.
  2. When asked to work in a group with a couple of pretty girls who (understandably) find you annoying, you throw a tantrum, refuse to join them, and pout in the corner.
  3. You have a voice comparable to, but (if possible) even more annoying than, that “So Lonely” song.
  4. It is debatable whether or not you are over five feet tall.
  5. Your lip quivers and you tear up when your teacher (in a moment, soon deeply regretted, of misguided and less than professional playfulness meant to be taken in the friendly spirit of good-natured ribbing) calls you “El Camarone Diablo.”

*None of these Indicators, apparently, as evidenced by the case of 15-year-old "Roberto Delgado," are actually significant enough to exclude one from full-fledged, official banana, yellow bandana, contractually-bound membership in the Latin Kings.

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